Change Begins On The Inside: It’s ALL About You!

 Realize what POW-er you have and how to use it…

“Did you know that every time you talk about an unhealed wound or trauma, you re-activate it in your emotional, spiritual, and physical bodies? As you speak, or even think, about an old issue, you experience it as if it is happening right now. Since your subconscious mind does not know the difference between current experience and past memory, for all intents and purposes, the trauma or negative experience is happening now…emotions-frequency

Unfortunately, when an issue is re-activated, instead of using it as a healing opportunity, many of us react by pushing the wounds down with numbing substances like food, drugs, internet, Facebook, TV, and a long list of other distractions.

Unhealed issues get stored in the body, until we release them. The body obliges as a storehouse for emotional wounds but it does take its toll, especially if issues are accumulated for long periods of time. Storing wounds in the body eventually weakens the body and invites illness and disease, as well as causing depression…The good news is that the body is ready to release issues, the moment you are.

When an unhealed issue is re-activated, don’t just push it down – take the time to finally heal it. This means creating intentional space to [FEEL] your emotions and allow the issue to process through to Healing. Once you allow yourself to fully experience these emotions for the first time, without resistance, you will innately know what path to healing is right for you.

Wounds are meant to be healed. We are not meant to spend our lives carrying around past issues and hurts.…

Wounds want to be healed and issues want to be released, but you have the last say. None of this can happen until you are ready and willing.

You are meant to be free and clear of emotional burdens. You are meant to live a limitless life with an abundance of love and creativity. You are meant to stand on the mountain top with arms stretched wide – willing to receive your grandest dreams. The Universe is listening.” –Nanice Ellis, Contributing Writer for Wake Up World

Do you desire emotional, spiritual, and physical wholeness? Do you remember your heart’s desires? Reply or email me and let’s talk.

Hungry Minds and Open Eyes

“There is nothing you can learn from as much as a problem you cannot fully solve. Unsolved problems can be some of the greatest tormentors, but also the greatest teachers. Unsolved problems keep the mind hungry and the eyes open.” –Jonathan Zap

My intention for my “Journey to Wholeness” series is to break mindsets, stimulate curiosity, and bring enlightenment to well-being—being well physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. It is a nudge to drop labels—“short, fat, narrow-minded, empty-headed, New Age.” Remain open-minded, non-judgmental of “other-mindedness.”

When we think we know the mind of God, spiritual growth is thwarted. Where is faith? If a marksman or sharpshooter cuts off his trigger finger, he has no further use of his rifle.

By his writings, it seems that Nietzsche lost his faith at the age of 20. Regarding such, here is what he wrote in a letter to his sister: “Hence the ways of men part: if you wish to strive for peace of soul and pleasure, then believe; if you wish to be a devotee of truth, then inquire…”

Was that his last hypothesis after meeting God, again? Who are we to judge?

My point: if you have allowed disappointment from the actions, words, or behaviors of another human being, that’s no reason to throw in the towel on all humanity. The same goes for not receiving the answer you desired from your prayers, life plan, or religion. Continue seeking answers to these “unresolved problems.” Like Zap said, use them as your teachers.

It’s been a week since my series ended. I feel a responsibility to keep your brain from going mushy, so-o-o the last link in my article is to help you keep a hungry mind and open eyes.

Here are a couple of the author’s quotes (Gary ‘Z’ McGee, taken from his “Waking Times”) to prime your mind:

“From microcosm to macrocosm we are infinite beings perceiving an infinite reality using finite faculties.” (That’s us humans trying to figure out the universes, using our mere intellect—devoid of spirituality.)

“Atoms consist of 99.9999999% empty space. That means: everything from the chair you’re sitting on, the computer you’re staring at, even you, are only .000000001% there.” (If you read this for the second time, and no one’s there to witness it, does that mean you’re not there either? Huh?!)

Okay, back to another dimension. Here’s a two-minute exert of theoretical physicist, Dr. Michio Kaku (my second favorite physicist, after “Mysteries of the Universe” narrator, Brian Cox, on the Science Channel), answering Andre Lapiere’s question: “Are there only three dimensions in other universes or could there be more?”

HIP-HIP-HORRAY, for big thinkers!

If any of this intrigues you, here’s a DEEP, humorous rabbit hole…one curious click after another. Be forewarned:

“You are traveling through another dimension, a dimension not only of sight and sound but of mind. A journey into a wondrous land of imagination. Next stop, the Twilight Zone!” (Season 3 of Twilight Zone-introduction by Rod Serling)


Worth, Value, and Nostalgia

Disability aside, have you ever hitched a ride or picked up a hitchhiker? Whether for a single mile to get gas for your/their empty tank or for a thrilling cross-country trek, you know a bad ride.

And, if you have ever been the host ride for the tenacious cockle burr, you know the aggravation and pain of these small ½-inch long, brown burred seeds with sharp, hooked spines. They are hitchhikers from hell, traveling the world by stealthily sticking to your clothing and/or your pet’s fur! My bloody fingers have felt like pin cushions after unwinding my Irish Setter’s long silky hair from their snare.

What made me think of hitchhiking? A math compass from a drafting course I took in the 1800s (a little before my SCI) that has mysteriously found its way to my keyboard tray. How is it that some things stick with us after high school and college graduations through multiple storages, transfers, uproots, marriage, and divorce?

What greater worth does a 6-inch metal math compass have over a luxuriously overstuffed, expensive upholstered chair that I left in one of my moves! For that matter, a couch in another? Nostalgia.

Before living with a disability, I used to love browsing through hardware stores. Yes, small town hardware stores! They reek of yesteryear. I loved the feel and smell of suede gloves, the fantasy of an overstuffed and oft’ used tool belt, puzzling assortments of hammers with every length and shape of nail, drawers of miscellaneous pulls and knobs, every type of rake and hoe…which brings me to Goldie.

Goldie was an avid gardener. She nurtured fields of fruits, vegetables, and flowers. She canned, pickled, and/or froze the produce, even pressed and dried her flowers. But, what most impressed me was her hoe. Yes, her garden hoe.

It was the only hoe she had ever used, was almost as old as she was, and boasted a filed down 2-inch blade, compared to its initial 3 1/4-inch depth! To maintain its best hoeing self, she sharpened it after each season’s use.

I grew up on a farm and we always had a garden; but, I had never known anyone like Goldie who took such care of their hoe. I thought her attention to its excellence was as extreme as my dad’s cleaning of his firearms after each hunt. The seed was sown. I wanted a hoe to cherish. I wanted to wield it for as long as Goldie had. Goldie was the inspiration for my first organic garden.

At twenty-six, I prepared, composted, hoed, planted, groomed, irrigated, and cultivated that garden. Its greatest yield was two dozen pints of hot chow-chow/relish. (My dad called it “pea ruiner.”) Disappointingly, bugs got the Brussels sprouts and broccoli; my Irish Setter got the cantaloupes and watermelons. When they were mere hardball size, he picked them for lone games of toss and catch!

As destiny would have it, I experienced a SCI before the next planting. My hoe blade was never sharpened. But, my metal math compass has inexplicably made its way to my keyboard tray. For a finger function substitute, I use its sharp point as a flip-top opener for sodas and juices. That’s its helpful function.

With every pro, there’s a con. The “con” of its sharp point: piercing one of these tin cans! The carbonated contents of a Sierra Mist spewed four feet onto the nearest wall—showering its ant attracting sugar across papers, files, books, and bills—until the liquid level fell below the can’s pierce. I finally wised up midway through its geyser and tilted the can away from the wall to lower the liquid’s level and stop its display.

No matter. It’s my little nostalgic hitchhiker treasure of bygone days. It’s not a sharpened hoe blade, but it makes its point.

Blue Bird Days

For several years after embarking on my chariot (wheelchair) ride, I experienced a brooding sadness. No one knew about it, only me. After the second year, I pinpointed it to occur for a couple of months in the fall. It dissipated as subtly as it appeared.

In the third and final year, I realized it was a mild depression. This sadness resulted from my association with the month of my SCI, September, and the loss of participating in favorite fall activities and exhilarating winter sports. This realization began my resurrection.

I had already grieved the death of sojourning the remainder of my life via feet (although I do believe in miracles). Now, it was time to bury old dreams and resurrect new hopes.

I leased an apartment in a newly completed complex. I recall the prediction of a possible evening snow. With the late-night news came the announcement that, indeed, it was snowing.

I threw on a shawl, wheeled out to the sidewalk, and laid my head back as silent snowflakes sifted softly onto my face. I lingered there for the longest, drinking in the peaceful beauty, and praising God, out loud.

Yes, I remember wondering if my neighbors thought I was crazy; but my joy trumped worrying about what they thought. I missed the snow. Just because I couldn’t ski or cross country in it, didn’t lessen my delight. I was in heaven. (A “crippling” half-inch accumulation of snow caused all schools to be closed the next day. What?)

In recognizing my sadness, I could open the mental windows for fresh ideas to circulate. My desire to do something about it, to find happiness in other ways, was the door to my freedom. Choosing to make the emotional change adjusting to disability, put me on my healing path.

My first book, Views From My Chariot: A Wheelchair Oddity , is a beginner course for you to recognize fresh ideas that will revive your hopes for a promising future after disability, resuscitate mental clarity for strength to push forward, and encourage you to open the door to the productive, fulfilling future that awaits you. It’s your choice.

Still, snow is rare in Alabama, but that doesn’t limit my experiencing it. Warren Miller Entertainment provides me vicarious thrills “catchin’ air” around the world. Mostly, they film heli-skiing and backcountry skiing, WAY beyond my expertise. But this way, everyday is a blue bird day on champagne powder for me!

“On your left!”


Wheelchair Derailment

As with any permanent disability (even a temporary impairment, illness, or disease), the path we were traveling diverges into an unfamiliar one. We don’t plan on, nor are prepared for, these life interruptions. So, what to do?

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross and David Kessler’s book, The Five Stages of Grief is a recommended read for understanding the emotional processes we journey through in order to reach the stage of acceptance. Whether it is death, disease, disability, illness, or a disaster, these stages are for anyone going through a significant loss.

Not everyone dealing with a life-altering or life-threatening issue will experience all five stages, and the stages may not occur in this particular order. As a “one-up” for anyone confronted with a traumatic event, I will vastly condense these five stages until you can read it for yourself.

1.Denial                                                                                                                                   “I’ll be fine.” “There’s been a mistake.” Something overwhelming has happened and a state of shock ensues. We’re uncertain if we can cope with this new reality, if we want to, or even why we should. Denial helps us pace our grief. As we ask, “Why?” and “Why me?” we begin the healing process.

2.Anger                                                                                                                                    Pain is disguised behind anger. Because we feel separated from normalcy by our predicament, anger connects us to something or someone—no matter how misguided. Some direct the anger at themselves; others may verbally abuse loved ones, even lash out physically. If you are family or a friend, wear an emotional bullet-proof vest or helmet for the duration. It isn’t personal.

3.Bargaining                                                                                                                               “If only” and “What if” lock us into the past where we were once safe; this allows us to time travel, back and forth, in our hurt. Bargaining is not sustainable.

4.Depression                                                                                                                               Sadness is a natural response to a loss, and the emotional detachment from life is evidence that we are looking reality in the face; but, this is not the time to try to cheer us up. However, with prolonged hopelessness, irrational or unrealistic thoughts, loss of appetite, and excessive sleep, professional intervention may be needed.

5.Acceptance                                                                                                                               Accepting a temporary or permanent condition does not mean that we believe it is an okay reality. It just means that we realize we must readjust, reorganize, and relearn to live life in a different way.

Once we’ve made it to acceptance, there will be occasional sadness and frustration. That’s being real. Then, it’s time to think about the future. Can you do something now to get back on the track you were traveling before? If so, go for it!

I went back into speech and language pathology, with a twist. I worked with the regular population before my disability; afterward, I worked in special education. An added benefit during my adjustment was that the workplace was accessible.

If that part of your life is over, try new things. In our PC world, there is a multitude of home-based opportunities. Just don’t allow a rut to form—physically or mentally.

After ten years, I began counseling and writing. After that, I used my interior design to start a business and kept writing.  Early this summer, my first book is coming out! My life is still under construction, and my ideas continue paving new roads to travel.

Pay attention to the pop-ups on your mental screen. Is it something you regret passing up, or something you sacrificed? Is it on your bucket list, or is it a pie in the sky idea you dismissed and never reached for? They could be trying to tell you something.

“Don’t be pushed by your problems. Be led by your dreams.” (Proverb)

It’s never too late to get back on a dream’s track.